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Categories » Confessions » New Motherhood Confessions » Grandparents

Grandparents
Anonymous
Grandparents | 5/1/09 7:40 AM
For some reason, I thought that my mother-in-law - and my own mother, for that matter - would be a little more helpful than they are.

Is it just my imagination or are today's grandparents a little different than the ones we grew up with?!?!

snowball164

Rank: out of the nursery
Posts: 163
Joined: 6/15/08
Full Term
RE: Grandparents | 5/1/09 1:34 PM as a reply to Anonymous.
Why do you say that? What's going on?

I seemed to have lots of help with my first baby. And the second. But with this third one on the way...it's like no one has been as helpful or even interested.(when I've needed help the most)
Now with two kids running around and my husband in Iraq, I wonder how I will even juggle the delivery alone and who will watch the kids. No one has stepped up so far. And it kinda makes me feel real alone on this.
MonnieB

Rank: sprout
Posts: 77
Joined: 11/8/08
Full Term
RE: Grandparents | 5/2/09 4:20 AM as a reply to Anonymous.
Well, my impression is that 30 years ago or so women generally tended to be more family-centric than they are today. I don't know much about your situation, but have you tried just asking them for help with specific things? Perhaps they're waiting to take your lead? Perhaps they're trying to respect your space? Talk it out, explain your expectations, learn about the limits of what they can give, and accept them for respecting their own boundaries. If they are not able to provide everything you are looking for, hopefully there is someone else in your life who can fill the gaps.

Good luck!

 

 

sseeger

Rank: out of the nursery
Posts: 113
Joined: 8/11/08
Full Term
RE: Grandparents | 5/2/09 11:05 AM as a reply to Anonymous.
My mom and MIL have been VERY helpful with the baby, but usually only when I ask for help. I think that they don't want to offend me by offering help by making it sound like I can't handle it. When I call my mom or MIL for help, they are over asap! My MIL spent the night the first few nights we brought Marcus home (she lives just 5 minutes away and my mom is nearly two hours away).

They may just not want to upset you - if you need some help, speak up! I'm sure they would be more than happy to help out!