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Categories » Confessions » Husband will be deployed during birth

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Husband will be deployed during birth
Anonymous
Husband will be deployed during birth | 8/11/09 7:30 AM
My husband will be deploying in September and we are due January 1. 2010. I was just wondering if anyone else has been through that. He won’t be able to come home for the birth. He will be in a remote place so we can’t do a live web feed from the hospital. It is our first child. I think I have handled it pretty well, so I am sorry if it sounds like a pity party today. I keep the feelings inside, because I don’t want to upset my husband. I know that he cannot change that he has to leave. He is sad that he will miss everything. Our daughter will be about 5 months old when he gets home. I just needed to hear some violins today. Sorry it’s so shallow.
kim.abc.123

Rank: sprout
Posts: 75
Joined: 3/28/09
RE: Husband will be deployed during birth | 8/11/09 8:54 AM as a reply to Anonymous.
I can kind of relate. My husband is military as well. However, he will be here for the birth. OUr baby is due in Oct, but he will be deploying in mid Jan/early Feb for about 4-5 months. He'll miss so much of the baby's growth! I know how you feel....unfortunately, it's part of our lives that we have to deal with. Just hope that you have wonderful friends and family to help and support you! Anytime you need to vent or talk, you can find me and we can comisserate together! :-)
Anonymous
RE: Husband will be deployed during birth | 8/11/09 9:09 PM as a reply to Anonymous.
It will be oky. You are a strong womn. I know its hard, and a lil scary but it will be okay. When hubbie gets home he will be more into the baby... he will try to make up for the time he missed. The best thing you can do not only for you sanity but also to help him is to take as many pictures and videos as you can. Since you cant do a live feed the chaplian or even the rear d. commander can get in contact with them while they are down range.If you dont mind it have the birth recorded.... and send it through a feed on AKO, or via the rear d/chaplian. Its just a sugestion. Also depends on the unit and how deep they are in the sand box at the time.

All will be fine, even though he will be gone you still have a family to support you and he has his brothers there to support him. Just remember one thing weither this is your first deployment or even if your a deployment pro, always try to let him know whats going on at home and to let him "bitch" out his stress. It will/can help you both.

Its not shallow by the way to feel like this, its good. Its what will keep you going strong not only for you and the baby but also for the hubbie.

 

 

Katie923

Rank: dedicated
Posts: 267
Joined: 1/13/09
Full Term
RE: Husband will be deployed during birth | 8/12/09 6:45 AM as a reply to Anonymous.
My husband was in the Guard for 6 years. We waited to get pregnant until after he was out because that was one of my biggest fears. I was so relieved when he said he didn't want to re-enlist. I had several friends go through it, though. It wasn't easy, but they were all able to make it work. Maybe you could tape the birth and send it to him. You could even take videos each week or so. That way he doesn't miss out watching his little girl grow up. He could even tape himself and send it so she can see him too. We did that for my husband whenever we did something that he couldn't be a part of. And just because there's nothing that can be done about the situation, doesn't mean that you can't tell him how you're feeling. Deployment is just as hard on the family as it is on the soldier. You still need his support, just as I'm sure you'll be giving him as much support as you can.
Anonymous
RE: Husband will be deployed during birth | 8/12/09 2:38 PM as a reply to Anonymous.
Thanks for all the support. It is our 2nd deployment. He got back from Iraq in September. He is off to Afghanistan now. I have my good days and my bad. I am not sure if I am going to tape the birth, I am a little shy. I have moved off base and back home with my parents, so its a change not being on base. Thank you again for all the love.
MsJackson
RE: Husband will be deployed during birth | 10/8/09 4:29 PM as a reply to Anonymous.
I am going through the same thing my husband will deploy in march and i am due in june i just moved to jacksonville, nc and idk anyone here this is our first baby and it makes me sick to look at him to know that he wont be there my baby should not have to be without a father just because he wanted to be a marine!

 

 

snowball164

Rank: out of the nursery
Posts: 134
Joined: 6/16/08
Full Term
RE: Husband will be deployed during birth | 10/12/09 11:53 AM as a reply to Anonymous.
I'm almost in the same boat. My husband was deployed for my entire pregnancy. He had to pull major strings to barely make it in time for the birth. And our little girl wasn't even 2 months and he deployed again.
I'm also in a new area. Moved from NM to CA. So I don't know anyone.

It's hard. And we can't web chat where he's at this time. And by the time he gets back the baby will be walking.
Hang in there. Take lots of pictures and movies. And try to distract yourself with the kiddos.
theEddys

Rank: bean
Posts: 5
Joined: 4/2/09
38th Week
RE: Husband will be deployed during birth | 10/12/09 3:00 PM as a reply to Anonymous.
I'm right there with ya. My husband is deploying the end of the month and our baby is due around December 6th. Its really hard to cope with the fact that he's not going to be by my side during labor and be there to see his first child being born but... I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason... I know I'm not the only one that has gone through a birth alone & I have a lot of supportive family and friends- All you can do is be strong,for him, for yourself and for the little one on the way. I wasnt planning on taping the birth but now that my husband wont be there I'm going to just so he can have something to remember it by. If you check your hospital where you plan to give birth (if its military) sometimes they have programs set up so your husband can watch the birth live via webcam... but that also depends on where he is, and what his job is. You'll just have to look forward to the day he comes home and you get to greet him with his baby- it'll be a very speical, emotional homecoming. Good luck & God Bless... You'll do just fine.
Anonymous
RE: Husband will be deployed during birth | 10/12/09 3:04 PM as a reply to Anonymous.
Keep your head up too MsJackson! I'm also stationed @ Lejeune with my hubby... The good thing is your husbands deployment dates are still somewhat far away... I'm sure his dates will change 100 times before he actually leaves... NOTHING in the military is every 100% until it actually happens. My husbands last deployment dates changed uncountable times before he actually left... we didnt know he was leaving for sure until 2 weeks before his flight... So You might get lucky... & depending on whether the President signs off on sending more troops- they might not be deploying at all... We can only pray things get better. God Bless & good luck!



Semper Fi

 

 

Jennominal

Rank: out of the nursery
Posts: 102
Joined: 8/11/08
32nd Week
RE: Husband will be deployed during birth | 10/12/09 3:27 PM as a reply to Anonymous.
My husand isn't in the military but his job requires him to be traveling out of state for a month at a time at least and only being home for 10 days when he is back. My baby is due on January 17, 2010 and he is scheduled to be back January 13, 2010. So we don't know if he will be here for the birth or not. I am counting on him not being there just so that I don't get my hopes up that he will be and he isn't. Good luck to you!
 
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